Our Flag Means Death Spec - Revenge on the Revenge

INT. THE REVENGE, STEDE’S OFFICE - NIGHT

Both Stede and Blackbeard lounge on his sofa as Stede reads and Blackbeard pretends to read. He glances over at Stede catching his eye.

STEDE

Oh do I love reading after a thrilling adventure.

Gives Blackbeard a playful shove.

STEDE

Co-captain.

He raises his glass of brandy.

STEDE

Cheers!

BLACKBEARD

Uh huh, cheers.

They clink their glasses. Stede watches as Blackbeard pulls attention to his book, straining to read.

STEDE

Do you need any help?

Blackbeard slams the book shut.

BLACKBEARD

It’s hard when your hammered... I’m able to read a few words though. Like...The. And. I.

STEDE

Amazing work my friend. Let me see.

Stede raises his glass to cheers again.

STEDE

Co-captain.

He hands the book over, it’s Titus Andronicus by William Shakespeare.

BLACKBEARD

You know, we don’t have to cheers every time one of us says that.

STEDE

But I can’t help being excited. Think about it. Our crew will have the best of both. My charisma and your...? Your brutality.

BLACKBEARD

Part fancy boys ‘n part real bad ass pirates.

Stede checks out the story.

STEDE

Ah, Shakespeare can be difficult.

BLACKBEARD

I literally have no idea what they’re saying. But I enjoy the violence.

Stede gives him a warm smile.

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT

The crew is all around the ship going about their business. Settling in for bed after their day of picking oranges. The Swede is eating oranges as fast as he can without choking. Lucius watches with a raised eyebrow.

LUCIUS

Hey!

THE SWEDE

What?

LUCIUS

Take it easy on those. You better be leaving some for the rest of us.

THE SWEDE

Were your teeth falling out?

LUCIUS

No.

THE SWEDE

Then uh, shut your trap.

The Swede spits up some orange juice on Lucius.

LUCIUS

Fine.

(to himself)

Disgusting.

Then wipes the juice off his pants.

EXT. THE REVENGE, BOW - NIGHT

Olu, lost in thought, looks out to the dark sea next to Buttons, who he has fully tuned out.

BUTTONS

(poetically)

As a young lad I’d watch ships like these. But this is the fanciest one I’d ever did see.

Buttons sees Olu not paying attention, but rambles on.

BUTTONS

Which each passin’ wave, she approaches near. Will she realize were even here.

OLUWANDE

Sorry. What are you going on about?

BUTTONS

Look to ye left.

Olu lazily turns his head to see the aristocrat ship, from the fancy dinner party, approaching. Olu jolts up.

OLUWANDE

Whoa!

Whips his head to Buttons.

OLUWANDE

Buttons?! Why didn’t you tell me a ship was coming??

BUTTONS

That’s what I’d be talkin’ bout this whole time!

OLUWANDE

Oh no no no. I do not want to deal with this right now.

The crew is below on the deck. Olu yells out to Frenchie.

OLUWANDE

Frenchie!

Frenchie startles awake clutching his guitar and points to him self.

OLUWANDE

Yes you!

Frenchie takes his time to walk over.

OLUWANDE

Hurry up!

He gets to Olu totally oblivious.

FRENCHIE

Uh huh?

Olu shoves his face to the direction of the ship. It’s closer than it was before. This realization dawns on Frenchie.

FRENCHIE

Oh shit.

TITLE IMAGE: OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH

The title is etched and slightly charred on a fancy wig.

EXT. THE REVENGE, BOW - NIGHT

Buttons keeps one eye on Olu and Frenchie bickering and another on the aristocrat ship.

OLUWANDE

Yeah oh shit is right! We kinda set their ship on fire.

FRENCHIE

Their not getting my cut of the money back.

OLUWANDE

That doesn’t matter, right now!

Well this is just great, they’re so annoying!

FRENCHIE

Maybe they’ve come to kill us?

BUTTONS

Revenge on the Revenge eh?

FRENCHIE

Naw, their too stupid to do anything though.

OLUWANDE

Right. No need to make a big fuss.

Buttons looks down to the crew. They are settling in to sleep.

BUTTONS

(to crew)

All of yah, brace yeselves! We got company!

They grumble looking around.

BUTTONS

They appear ta be.

(dramatic pause)

Idiots.

Everyone tries getting up before seeing grappling hooks come raining down.

INT. THE REVENGE, STEDE'S OFFICE - NIGHT (LATER)

Stede yawns before closing his book

STEDE

I think it’s time we go to bed. Co-captain.

Stede leans over to grab more brandy. Blackbeard rolls his eyes but leans in to cheer for one last time, but before their glasses collide the ship rocks violently and they bang their heads together.

BLACKBEARD

Jesus what was that?

STEDE

Oh dear!

Blackbeard spots a book flying towards them and swats it away from Stede’s face, but the chandelier above the sofa smashes on them, causing them to blackout.

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT

The crew gathers to assess the situation. The grappling hooks have made their way onto the ship and pulling the two ships together, they all stumble to regain their footing. Frenchie raises a finger with an idea.

FRENCHIE

(to Olu)

You know what you should do. Put on your prince outfit again.

OLUWANDE

They know now I’m not a real prince!

ROACH

Wait. These are the ones you and Frenchie scammed.

Frenchie nods.

ROACH

Nice.

WEE JOHN

How did no one spot the ship comin’?

Olu and Frenchie shrug, Buttons raises his hand high.

BUTTONS

I did! I knew!

In the distance Antoinette and Gabriel are figuring out how to get onto the revenge, and who should go over first. The crew takes a look over to them, seeing that they have time to think of a plan.

BLACK PETE

(to Olu and Frenchie)

Seems like this is a problem for you two.

(then to crew)

I say we throw Olu and Frenchie over board!

(no one responds)

Who’s with me!?

Olu turns to Black Pete.

OLUWANDE

Hey!

LUCIUS

Listen everybody! By the sound of it, these people are imbeciles. We can handle them.

WEE JOHN

I wouldn’t be so sure about that. Those bitches used grappling hooks... this is serious

Frenchie shakes Olu’s shoulders excitedly.

FRENCHIE

Put on the prince costume!

WEE JOHN

Wait, are you talkin’ about the really nice jacket you had on once? With them nice cuffs?

FRENCHIE

Ah, yeah.

WEE JOHN

I love that jacket. I’ve snuck into you and Jim’s room to take a look more that once.

OLUWANDE

What, why?

WEE JOHN

I’ll get it.

OLUWANDE

But!

Wee John darts off before Olu can stop him.

OLUWANDE

For God’s sake I don’t need the stupid outfit! We need to stall em, yeah?

(to Black Pete)

Go get Stede!

CREW

Aye!/Get stede!/Good idea!

Black Pete reluctantly strides away.

BLACK PETE

You can’t tell me what to do. And screw Stede! I’m getting Blackbeard.

OLUWANDE

Hey come on now.

(then)

Actually...that’s probably a good idea.

CREW

Aye!/Yeah.../Blackbeard’s the better choice.

Antoinette and Gabriel wave to the crew to get their attention. They are still having trouble getting over to the Revenge. A few of their servants try to lift them over.

ANTOINETTE

Watch the outfit! My goodness.

They turn their attention to the Revenge crew.

GABRIEL

Ah, helllooo?

ANTOINETTE

Can someone please assist us onto your ship? So we can destroy you.

No one makes an attempt to help.

INT. THE REVENGE, STEDE'S OFFICE - NIGHT

Black Pete runs calmly into the room. He notices the both of them are fully passed out.

BLACK PETE

Blackbeard!

He goes over and pushes Stede aside, checking if Blackbeard is still breathing.

BLACKBEARD

(grumbles)

BLACK PETE

What’s that?

He leans down, close to Blackbeard’s face.

BLACK PETE

You want me to take over as captain? Cause I’m the most bad ass?

(Blackbeard says nothing)

I’m the best pirate you’ve ever seen?

Black Pete gets a sparkle in his eye.

BLACK PETE

Well if you say so!

He runs away all giddy.

BLACK PETE

I won’t let you down!

Moments later Wee John stops in the doorway to see Stede and Blackbeard.

WEE JOHN

Ah!

(drops jacket)

Oh fucking hell.

(dusts it off)

Sorry jacket.

He sprints back to the deck.

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT

The crew is still staring over at the aristocrat ship. Black Pete walks up to Olu.

OLUWANDE

Where’s Blackbeard?

BLACK PETE

Oh, he told me to take over as captain for this situation.

They all look at him unconvinced.

CREW

Christ./Noooo!/Mutiny!

BLACK PETE

That’s right you all have to listen to moi.

Just then Antoinette and Gabriel stumble onto the Revenge. They fix each others slightly burnt outfits then turn to address the group. Gabriel holds a small lantern.

GABRIEL

(to revenge crew)

Well! Where are your manners? My lady and I are struggling and what do you do? Nothing!

ANTOINETTE

Thought you could get away from us scotch free?

GABRIEL

You thought wrong!

Wee John, interrupting with his wheezing, hands Olu the jacket so he can quickly put it on.

WEE JOHN

Pass-passed out...the two of them. Madness...

OLUWANDE

(to Black Pete)

That makes more sense.

BLACK PETE

Damnit.

ANTOINETTE

Enough! Bring us to that imposter Godfrey Thronrose.

LUCIUS

Who?

FRENCHIE

(whispers to Lucius)

She means Stede.

BLACK PETE

And if we don’t?

They both stutter a second.

GABRIEL

We will set your ship on fire this time!

Black Pete sees the pathetic lantern Gabriel holds.

BLACK PETE

Please, you drop that and I’ll just put a blanket over it. Problem solved. I’m such a good captain.

Gabriel and Antoinette look at each other.

GABRIEL

That’s why we brought backup.

Behind him on the aristocrat ship are a ton of servants holding up fire sticks and bigger lanterns. The crew’s eyes widen.

GABRIEL

Scared now?

ANTOINETTE

You see, when you left our party, we tried to get the fire out the best we could. Truly.

INT. ARISTOCRAT SHIP, DINING ROOM - NIGHT (QUICK CUT)

All of them trying to put the fire out with water and blankets.

GABRIEL (V.O.)

Who knew fire would be, how you say.. so unruly.

They accidentally pour alcohol, making the fire worse. Antoinette and Gabriel’s hair starts to burn, their make up melts off.

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT

GABRIEL

And! To top it all off like a scrumptious cherry, we come to find that you too!

Points to Olu and Frenchie.

GABRIEL

Gave money to our servants, so they could leave us. All alone.

ANTOINETTE

Most importantly. After all this.

(tears up)

Nobody wants to go to our parties anymore.

GABRIEL

We.

(chokes up)

Don’t even get invites to other extravagant dinner gatherings.

Roach whispers to Buttons.

ROACH

I could kill them right now. You just tackle them and I’ll slit their throats.

BUTTONS

Let em get it out. Must’ve been weighing on them chests.

Roach groans. Antoinette glares at them.

ANTOINETTE

Excuse me? Is there something more important than our tragic story.

Gabriel dramatically waves the lantern.

ANTOINETTE

Now, we’ve got new servants, and sought out your pathetic ship..

EXT. ARISTOCRAT SHIP, DECK - NIGHT (QUICK CUT)

Gabriel and Antoinette point to The Revenge in the distance. A servant tries to light the cannons, that are covered with dust, clearly never used.

ANTOINETTE (V.O.)

We decided to use our cannons for the first time.

(dramatic sigh)

However, had trouble lighting the fuse. It was simply taking forever.

Gabriel gets impatient and lunges towards it, catching on fire and spreading it to the others. They run around the deck in circles screaming.

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT

The crew is sitting down now, making themselves comfortable. Buttons stares off into the distance.

BUTTONS

Aye, must have patience with ye cannon. Made that mistake meself once.

GABRIEL

Silence! I’m going to drop this lantern now and leave you all to burn!

Frenchie starts a slow clap. He puts his arm around Gabriel’s shoulders.

FRENCHIE

Wow, what a riveting story. But we have no idea what you are talking about, right guys?

The crew nods.

FRENCHIE

You must have the wrong ship.

OLUWANDE

It definitely wasn’t us... Terribly sorry about your ship though.

Antoinette and Gabriel burst into laughter.

ANTOINETE/GABRIEL

Oh!/My Word!

They continue laughing hysterically.

ANTOINETTE

But you said!

GABRIEL

And then you said!

OLUWANDE

Right... so you must be on your way

BLACK PETE

Ugghhh! Fucking leave already.

The crew looks to each other, shooing them along, surprised they are getting away with this.

ANTOINETTE

That is mighty embarrassing.

GABRIEL

Oh goodness, go on about your night peasants. On your mediocre ship.

EXT. ARISTOCRAT SHIP, DECK - NIGHT

Suddenly another aristocrat from the fancy dinner party, Siegfried (who is now shredded), steps out. He doesn’t look like a fancy aristocrat anymore, but a chiseled pirate.

SIEGFRIED

Don’t let them fool you! That’s them alright. He’s even wearing the same jacket.

Both Antoinette and Gabriel gasp.

LUCIUS

(to Olu)

Who the hell is that?!

SIEGFRIED

Bring them to me.

A few servants grab Olu and Frenchie, dragging them to the aristocrat ship.

CREW

Wait a minute!/Bring them back!

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT

They hear Olu and Frenchie struggling.

ANTOINETTE

Stay right where you are! You lied to us, again?!

GABRIEL

I’ll drop this. I’ll actually do it this time.

They all back up.

ANTOINETTE

(to Roach)

Get Godfrey Thornrose. I want to catch the fear in his eyes when he sees his ship burning.

ROACH

Whatever.

They watch him leave. Gabriel nods at the servants behind him still on the aristocrat ship.

GABRIEL

Light them on fire!!

After nothing, Gabriel turns back to the servants with the fire.

GABRIEL

What are you waiting for?! Throw the fire already!

SERVANT

(yelling over)

But, sir you and the lady are still on the ship.

GABRIEL

So!?

SERVANT

Best you get off so you don’t get engulfed in the flames.

ANTOINETTE

Ah but of course.

GABRIEL

Thank you for reminding us.

Gabriel holds his hand out for Antoinette.

GABRIEL

My lady.

ANTOINETTE

(back to crew)

Hope you have a terrible night.

(laughs evilly)

Gabriel nearly trips, almost dropping the lantern. Lucius runs over to stop it from falling.

LUCIUS

Uh, careful with that! Wouldn’t want you to damage your... already burnt outfits.

Antoinette perks up.

ANTOINETTE

You like our outfits?

LUCIUS

I didn’t quite say that.

GABRIEL

On a scale of 1 to 10 how jealous are you?

ANTOINETTE

It’s the funniest story how we got them.

LUCIUS

Ah, do tell.. give us one more story before we die.

The crew grumbles and settles in like it’s a bedtime story with Stede.

INT. ARISTOCRAT SHIP, DINING ROOM - NIGHT

Olu and Frenchie are dragged to the dimly lit dining table. Siegfried sits across from them.

SIEGFRIED

Sit.

A servant sits them down. Another servant brings a lantern close to their faces.

SIEGFRIED

What do you think of my spotlight?

Olu and Frenchie exchange looks. Siegfried starts laughing evilly. Olu and Frenchie laugh along awkwardly.

SIEGFRIED

Thought it was fun to play a trick on us huh?

OLUWANDE

Ummm, uhhh...

FRENCHIE

Pretty much.

Siegfried abruptly stands up.

SIEGFRIED

It seems the day of reckoning is here. It’s time for my revenge.

He picks up a butter knife from the table and points it at them.

FRENCHIE

Fuck, this is going to be a slow death.

SIEGFRIED

I’m not talking about you! Antoinette and Gabriel.

OLUWANDE

The two ding dongs outside?

SIEGFRIED

Of course them! They held the worst party of the year!

INT. ARISTOCRAT SHIP - MONTAGE (QUICK CUT)

After the party Siegfried takes his wig and makeup off.

SIEGFRIED (V.O.)

You see it was me who tracked this ship down.

Siegfried gets new servants for the ship. They all look at maps.

SIEGFRIED (V.O.)

Me who convinced, as you said, those ding dongs, to burn your ship, so I could get them when they least expected it.

Siegfried starts working out and generally becoming a bad ass, with help from the servants motivating him.

INT. ARISTOCRAT SHIP, DINING ROOM - NIGHT

OLUWANDE

You couldn’t have just killed them in their sleep or somethin’?

SIEGFRIED

Oh no no no, I want you both to do the dirty work for me, so I can watch. You owe me.

Siegfried gets close to Olu’s face.

SIEGFRIED

Don’t you. Prince Azi.

FRENCHIE

Uh-

SIEGFRIED

If you refuse I will kill you.

FRENCHIE

With that itty bitty knife?

SIEGFRIED

Well, I was going to use this...

One of the servants brings out a massive sword. Olu and Frenchie gasp.

INT. THE REVENGE, STEDE'S OFFICE - NIGHT

Meanwhile, Roach looms over Blackbeard and Stede. He shakes Blackbeard. Pulling on his beard a bit.

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT

As Gabriel continues to hold the lantern, Antoinette tells her story. The crew is fully slouched over and bored. Black Pete hits his head repeatedly against a barrel. Wee John is the only one to kind of enjoy it.

ANTOINETTE

And so then, I told Francois he must make one for my brother as well.

Gabriel claps still holding the lantern.

GABRIEL

Oh my, my arm is so terribly tired.

LUCIUS

I feel like I’ve aged five years.

ANTOINETTE

Before he did though he told me all about his silk spun thread.

GABRIEL

Oh yes the silk spun thread. Can’t forget that.

BLACK PETE

(groans with pain)

ANTOINETTE

Silk spun thread must be done-

THE SWEDE

Someone make it stop. Please?

Antoinette is totally unfazed.

GABRIEL

Do you remember when we first made love in those silk robes.

They stare into each other’s eyes.

ANTOINETTE

Oh yes.

LUCIUS

My god.

ANTOINETTE

What a magical night. We were at our parent’s mansion.

LUCIUS

Shut up! Shut up! I can’t take it anymore.

Gabriel slaps Lucius pathetically across the face.

GABRIEL

Never. Tell my sister to shut up.

LUCIUS

Did you just slap me?

GABRIEL

I’ll do it again too.

Gabriel slaps his face back and forth until Black Pete stands up.

BLACK PETE

Don’t you dare touch him.

Black Pete slaps Gabriel hard, causing him to fall back. The four of them stare at each other having a stand off before more childish slapping begins.

WEE JOHN

Slap fight!

Everyone joins in.

INT. THE REVENGE, STEDE'S OFFICE - NIGHT

Roach gently slaps Stede and Blackbeard in the face.

ROACH

Wake up! And deal with these assholes, asshole.

Roach finds the leftover brandy and pours it on them. It looks like they are almost coming to.

BLACKBEARD

(grunts)

STEDE

Tea time?

But pass right back out.

ROACH

Ugh!

Roach brings out his long cooking knife. He looks like he about to cut Blackbeard’s finger.

ROACH

(to himself)

I can’t, can I?

INT. ARISTOCRAT SHIP, DINING ROOM - NIGHT

Siegfried demonstrates with the servants how he wants them to kill the siblings.

SIEGFRIED

(to Frenchie)

I want you to grab Gabriel.

(to Olu)

And I want you to sneak up behind Antoinette to stab her. Don’t be afraid to jostle the sword around a bit. Make them feel it.

FRENCHIE

Jesus. We could always steal from them?

OLUWANDE

I like that idea.

SIEGFRIED

No! I lost my money because they let imposters into such a fancy party. I loved that money like it was my brother. Do you know what it’s like to feel such loss?

OLUWANDE

Uh yeah actually, I do know.

SIEGFRIED

You do?

OLUWANDE

It’s the worst feeling in the world.

FRENCHIE

I-I did freak when someone took my cat flag.

Olu stifles a laugh.

FRENCHIE

I put a lot of effort into that!

SIEGFRIED

We have more in common than I thought.

(then)

So please, help me out? It’s the least you could do.

OLUWANDE

You will leave us alone after this?

SIEGFRIED

I give you my word.

FRENCHIE

We might as well get it done then.

OLUWANDE

Right. Give me that sword.

The servant hands it over. Siegfried hugs them.

SIEGFRIED

I knew you’d understand.

Olu pats him on the back.

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT

Everyones faces are red from slaps as Roach returns.

ROACH

What the hell is this?

EVERYONE

(screaming/fighting)

Wee John runs across.

WEE JOHN

Madness!

Lucius slaps Gabriel over and over. Lucius’ torn off finger leaks some blood from the impact.

GABRIEL

Ew, who cut off your finger?

LUCIUS

(like superhero)

I did.

(before slapping him again)

Antoinette slaps Buttons’ bird, Karl. Appalled Karl flaps a wing at her and flies toward her face.

EXT. ARISTOCRAT SHIP, DECK - NIGHT

Olu, Frenchie, and Siegfried make it to the deck to witness the fight.

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT

ROACH

(to crew)

Hey! We do have weapons!

Roach waves his cooking knife.

EVERYONE

Oh yeah!/That’s right!/I forgot about those.

BLACK PETE

Fuck all this slappin’.

Black Pete rips Antoinette’s wig off.

ANTOINETTE

Excuse you!

Roach is the first one to charge.

ANTOINETTE

Gabriel! Get back to the ship!

EXT. ARISTOCRAT SHIP, DECK - NIGHT

Antoinette and Gabriel get pushed closer and closer to the edge. The servants help them back over

GABRIEL/ANTOINETTE

(screaming)

Gabriel goes over to use a cannon. He lights a match unsuccessfully. Antoinette tries to help him but panics and starts throwing random things from the ship toward the Revenge.

Olu and Frenchie sneak up behind the aristocrats to strike, but soon enough Wee John swings over to grab Frenchie and bring him back to the Revenge. In doing so he bumps Siegfried overboard.

OLUWANDE

Oh my god!

Olu looks over the side.

BUTTONS

(yells to Olu)

Nows not the time to be all sentimental.

Wee John pulls Olu over next, they stumble across falling over. Wee John looks to Olu.

WEE JOHN

Did I hit something earlier?

Olu is shocked into silence.

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT

Roach and Black Pete use their weapons to chop off the grappling hooks. Gabriel in his last attempt, finally throws the lantern. It comes hurtling towards them, but The Swede slaps it, chucking it back over to them, setting the aristocrat’s ship on fire.

GABRIEL

Not again!

The crew gets the last grappling hook off. The aristocrats fall backward when the ship rocks. Some servants are crying over Siegfried.

OLUWANDE

I didn’t want him to die...

FRENCHIE

There, there. It’s okay, it’s done.

Olu watches in horror when a cannon explodes on the aristocrat ship.

OLUWANDE

What?! How did that even happen?!

The aristocrats run around screaming like before. The crew cheers with victory, patting The Swede on the back.

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT (LATER)

The crew frantically cleans up. Buttons carrying his bird goes to Olu. They’re still screaming in the distance.

BUTTONS

Gonna be hard to sleep with all the screamin’. Best clean up before cap’n wakes.

FRENCHIE

Don’t know why, the ship always looks like a dump.

WEE JOHN

Yeah, won’t cap’n be more suspicious if it’s tidy?

Olu tears his eyes away from the ship.

OLUWANDE

It’s the least we can do after almost wrecking the ship.

BLACK PETE

Man, we totally kick their asses!

ROACH

Who the hell, thought slapping was the way to go?

BLACK PETE

That was all Lucius.

(quick pause)

But yes let’s not talk about it ever again. Especially in front of Blackbeard.

The Swede eats an orange.

THE SWEDE

I wonder how they’ve survived this long out at sea.

FRENCHIE

My respect for Stede continues to grow.

They all smile.

EXT. THE REVENGE, DECK - NIGHT

They all sit around and put frozen meat and fish on their bruised faces.

BLACK PETE

Wait, where’s Jim?

Lucius sighs and dips his head in his hands.

LUCIUS

Really? This whole time you didn’t notice?

WEE JOHN

I knew one of us was missing.

They all look to Olu. He shifts uncomfortably.

OLUWANDE

Jim left to take care of some family business... but they’ll be back.

BUTTONS

Aye, they’ll be back before ye know it. They’re one mighty pirate.

They leave it at that. After a moment of silence, Blackbeard and Stede frantically arrive.

STEDE

It seems Blackbeard and I were out for a wee bit. We were reading you see, and then...

BLACKBEARD

Who the fuck knocked us out? Whoever did it better sleep with one eye open.

Stede gets over it immediately.

STEDE

Well, I’m sure there is a logical reason. It seems everyone is alright.

CREW

Sure are cap’n./Fine fine./All good here.

Blackbeard looks at them suspiciously and walks to the side of the ship.

OLUWANDE

It was just another boring night.

STEDE

Good.

BLACKBEARD

Oh really? What are these then?

He points to the grappling hook marks.

BLACKBEARD

And the ship in the distance that’s all smokey?

Blackbeard picks up Antoinette’s wig.

BLACKBEARD

And this wig?! Huh?

STEDE

Oh my days.

Blackbeard and Stede clearly remember the wig.

STEDE

What did they what?

BLACK PETE

They came here to set our ship on fire.

OLUWANDE

To be fair we did try hearing them out first.

Every one nods their head convincingly.

STEDE

Good for you all!

BLACK PETE

Then we were like, “defend the ship!” And got into an epic fight.

Black Pete acts out some fighting moves.

STEDE

They don’t seem like the fighting type.

BLACK PETE

Believe me they were vicious enemies. A few of us almost died. Pretty cool, right Blackbeard?

Everyone goes along nodding to the story. Blackbeard pauses.

BLACKBEARD

When you ripped this wig off did some of her scalp come off with it?

BLACK PETE

Oh yeah.

Blackbeard bangs his fist on the side of the ship. Startling everyone.

BLACKBEARD

So you’re telling me I missed all this action?!

BUTTONS

Will appear so.

BLACKBEARD

Fuck!

STEDE

Well at least we saw a lot of action treasure hunting on he island today.

Blackbeard holds himself back from saying something he is going to regret. He pats Stede’s shoulder.

BLACKBEARD

That we did Stede. That we did.

THE SWEDE

Orange?

He throws some to them. Blackbeard and Stede smile at each other before ripping apart their oranges.

STEDE

(to crew)

I have an announcement everyone. Blackbeard and I are now co-captains!

No one says anything, they are way too tired.

STEDE

Isn’t that just exciting. Part fancy boys, part real pirates.

The crew mumbles. Blackbeard and Stede smile at each other once more.

EXT/INT. THE REVENGE, OLU AND JIM’S ROOM - LATER THAT NIGHT

Olu takes a deep breath before walking in and hanging up his jacket. Looking at Jim's empty bed.

OLUWANDE

You’re really gone, huh?

He sits down solemnly.

END OF EPISODE